The Second Pregnancy

The second pregnancy is a big step in your life as a parent as well as in the life of your first born. On one hand you are embarking on a familiar journey and have a sense of what you can expect, while on the other hand you have a new set of responsibilities to juggle as you make the transition and become a larger family.

Am I Missing Out on the Pregnancy?

It takes a lot of resources – both financial and time – to raise a child. With all those demands constantly pressing on your time you may feel like you’re “missing out” on the new pregnancy. Many second-time parents fear that they will not bond as strongly with the new baby because so much of their time is taken up.

Will I Love One Child More Than The Other?

Many parents fear they will not love the new baby as much as their older child, or that the older child will feel replaced or unwanted. The older child is starting to become more independent and needs less hands-on time, but will they feel completely shut out when there is a new infant taking all of tired mom’s energies?

Safe Transitions

The best way to proceed will of course depend on the temperament and age of your oldest child. You can explain to a five year old what is going on and involve them in planning and decorating for the new baby, but a two-year-old won’t have the same level of comprehension – they can tell “something” is changing, but need to be carefully handled so they don’t wake up one morning and lose their room, lose horseback-mommy, and have to learn all new routines.

Much like the first pregnancy, they key to a comfortable transition is beginning early. No one gets a right to complain – mother nature gives us nine months to get our things in order and prepare for the change in our lives. Second-time (and third-time and fourth-time) parents have an ace up their sleeve in that they already know what to expect when bringing home an infant.

Stop. Breathe in. Breathe out. Now go and enjoy this amazing time!

When Baby Refuses Bottle

Just when you become accustomed to your baby behaving a certain way, suddenly their habits change and you find yourself dealing with a whole new set of circumstances. You may have been fortunate enough to have a baby that takes lots of naps during the day but now decides not to take any more naps at all. Or, like us, you may have a baby who suddenly decides that drinking from their bottle is too boring for their newly refined sense of self.

It can be tricky to figure out your child’s needs, particularly around the one-year mark. They can’t talk yet and tell you what’s on their mind. At the same time they want to experience more independence and begin learning skills (like walking and crawling) that they may not be fully prepared for. Before you know it you’re picking dirt out of their mouth even after you thought your floor was spotlessly clean.

When the baby refuses to drink, you have the tough job of figuring out whether they have become sick, whether they’re in pain because of teething issues, whether they are just being picky and need to be given a “sippy” cup, or whether they need to be left alone to play.

How to tell when your baby’s refusal to drink is serious enough to call the doctor

1. If the baby has a high fever (39.7/103.5 or more) take them to the emergency room immediately.
2. If your baby has a more mild fever, is sleepy or hard to wake, and refuses their bottles take them to see their doctor.
3. If your baby hasn’t passed stools for more than two days and is irritable, they could need help to soften their poop before they get a blockage. Take your child to the doctor soon especially if they are showing signs of pain when forcing.
4. Check for rashes, bug bites, ticks. Check everywhere – chest, back, arms, legs, armpits, groin area, scalp. A bug bite or infection can sometimes cause enough discomfort to preclude eating.

Air Conditioning Not Harmful to Babies; Fans Reduce Risk of SIDS

As I sit here in the humidity brought by the first heatwave of the summer, laptop burning a hole into my

thigh, I can’t help but wonder how my infant son is coping with the heat. He’s pulled his favourite toys together in front of the baby gate behind which I’ve placed a box fan in an attempt to circulate the air. If the heat bothers him, he’s not saying anything; he grins one of his toothy smiles at me when he notices I’m watching him, then goes back to playing.

Downstairs there is a central air unit missing one of the parts it needs to drain properly. The knowledge of its presence is almost taunting us. I look forward to the relief we will experience when we are finally able to cool the house down by only a few degrees.

Like everything else having to do with childcare, you will run into a lot of differing opinions about how best to help your children handle warm weather. The bottom of the pyramid here is hydration – like adults, children need more fluid to replace what they lose through sweat. Don’t feel shy about being generous with water and bottles especially if your child is going through a growth spurt.

Juices and pop should be avoided because they don’t give your child’s body any extra benefit – in the case of pops and sodas, the caffeine in the drink will actually act to dehydrate. Sport drinks like Gatorade may be helpful in small quantities during extreme heat because they will boost the electrolytes in your child’s body and help them feel more replenished.

There is a myth circulating around that air conditioning units are not safe for children because the cold can cause a chill or asthma later in life. This is hogwash. Air conditioning is safe for babies and can help them get a full night’s rest rather than tossing and turning because they are wet, sweaty and uncomfortable.

If you’re not fortunate enough to have an air conditioner, or if you don’t use one because you don’t feel your climate is oppressive enough, you may choose to use fans to help circulate the air. Good news! Research has shown that fans can greatly reduce the risk of SIDS. Sadly, fans do not cool the air, they only circulate the warm air already in the room.

Leave a comment with your tips for beating the heat in child-friendly ways!

Swine Flu and You (Don’t Be Afraid!)

I wanted to stay silent on the entire swine flu front but now that I’m hearing about it daily in my own

community it seems like the right time to say something.

If you’re terribly worried about the H1N1 (Swine flu) strain of influenza, my advice is don’t let it affect your daily life. Unless you’re able to stay in your home and have zero contact with the outside world, you may very well get infected.

Here’s the big thing to remember: there is nothing novel about this strain of the flu. It’s just like any other flu with symptoms ranging from runny nose, aches and pains, diharrea and vometting, high fever and coughing.

Not a Novel Disease

There’s really nothing brought to the table by H1N1 that you haven’t already seen during your previous encounters with the flu. What makes swine flu newsworthy is the fact that it is a mutation of the virus for which most people do not already have immunity, meaning it is capable of becomming a pandemic – that is, a lot of people infected over a wide area; it does not mean a lot of people are on their death beds.

Like any flu, the elderly and the very young are most at risk for serious complications. Take your baby into the hospital if they become listless, refuse to drink their bottle, have a high fever, are vomitting, do not want to be held or are unusually difficult to wake.

Nine Month Old Refuses to Drink Bottle

Our son was having a bad week. No bottle was good enough for him, and the ones he did drink ended up being decoration on his shirt when he threw up ten minutes later. Since I was taking penicillin for my strep throat, we assumed that the baby had picked up my infection and took him to see his doctor immediately.

Diagnosis: Attitude, not strep throat.

Apparently, around the end of their first year, children start wanting to assert more independence – never mind that they don’t have the skills needed to do so. Even though your child can’t yet walk (maybe they can’t even crawl yet!) you will find them trying to push themselves away from you and travel on their own. Their nutrition changes and the time is right to start weening them off the bottle and onto real milk and solid food.

This is the same time that sleeping habits start to change and originally docile babies start to become menaces. Just when you thought you were getting used to the routine of parenthood, it all changes! It’s time to start baby proofing your home, if you haven’t already, because your child will be discovering all imaginable dangers very soon.