Chores With a Child

So today I decided I was going to throw caution to the wind and let my almost three year old help me with my housework. You know my hat goes off to mothers that take the time to include their kids in this but I am not one of those women cut out to redo a chore multiple times.

It started with cleaning of the table after breakfast. I asked my son to put the bowls and cups in the sink. While I was busy changing my 14 month olds diaper I had not realized he put everything in the trash. So out of the trash and into the sink the dishes went. Then it was off to sort some clothes. Oh boy I need to warn you I hate doing laundry every aspect of it in fact whenever possible hubby does it for me. Everything was folded just needed to be sorted and put into the appropriate room. Well we got to sorting it then I closed the door and went back to the chore later on cause every item that was once folded was now unfolded.

We also attempted the clean up game for his toys and then I gave up. So maybe once he’s a little older I can try again or maybe I should start small like helping me clean the windows but I will definitely only let him help me with one task a day till he gets the hang of things. I will remember to have lots of time for the chore and not be in a rush as well as have an extra patch of patience.

So to all you moms and dads out there, it’s an adventure when your child wants to help with housework but it makes then happy and there’s nothing like a smile on their face.

Bedtime for Toddlers – My Child Does Not Want To Stay In Bed

It’s 7:30 and you find yourself wanting to say to your child: “I’m tired. You should go to bed.” It’s not easy keeping up with the boundless energy of a two-year-old. All of a sudden their temperament changes, and you find yourself fighting with them to get back into their bed.

After our third pregnancy, my son and daughter are adjusting to our new routine. Everything seemed fine while I was off work but as soon as I went back to the office Dylan began a new phase of separation anxiety. Whereas he would go to sleep by 7pm every night and stay in bed until 7am the next day on a routine that was perfectly matched to his body’s needs, he decided his new routine should be not going to sleep ever.

This was an exercise in frustration for everybody. Our first step was to put him back in his bed and calmly tell him to stay there. This technique works for time outs but it did not bring us any success keeping him in his room. Next we tried closing the door and keeping him in his room while we talked to him from the other side. My wife tried sleeping on the floor of his room so that he would see she was there and stay put – no luck. We even tried letting him nap with us in our bed, but nothing seemed to work. My son did not want to soothe, he wanted to scream himself to sleep and there was nothing we could do about it.

My wife got desperate and called the public health nurse for advice She suggested another tactic that seems to be working, and it involves a new way of approaching the situation with positivity. Here’s what we’ve done:

1. Turn off the TV at dinner time and don’t put it on again before bed.
2. Start giving the baby his bath at his former bed time. (Yes, that means he’s going to bed later, but he is older now so it’s OK).
3. After the bad, put on his PJs.
4. Put him in his bed, sit net to him, and read a complex chapter book.

I’m pleased that my son is old enough to appreciate reading time. It’s turned into an amazing way for us to spend some downtime together and he really enjoys the one-on-one time with his dad, so much so that during the day he keeps asking his mom when dad is going to come home and read to him. The best part is that he loses the fight and is asleep by 7:30 now with no screaming or yelling.

There are a lot of reasons why children have difficulty getting to sleep. In our case, my son was craving special attention and this was his way of communicating his needs to us. Now that we’ve wised up and understand the message, we’ve earned our evenings back and added a fulfilling new ritual to our daily routine.

What Connects us to the Sun?

From the mind of our two-year old:

Dylan: Mommy, turn on the lights.
Mom: We don’t need to turn on the lights, because the sun is a big lamp that lights up the inside and the outside.
Dylan: Where is the switch?

Introducing Babysitter Buddy

We’ve been busy! I’m proud to announce the launch of Babysitter Buddy, a tool for parents to help caregivers understand the best routines as well as food and medical needs for their children.

We’ve all written out lists of phone numbers, food preparation instructions and bedtime habits – Babysitter Buddy makes this process better by prompting with common information babysitters might need. Parents can be sure they haven’t gone away and forgotten some critical piece of information.

Check it out at http://www.babysitterbuddy.com – if you choose to sign up be sure to sign up for the mailing list for more hints, tips and safety advice.

The Third Pregnancy

Around this time last year, I mused about how we felt like we were speeding through my wife’s second pregnancy. Well, here we go again! If we thought the second pregnancy flew by, this one is already halfway through and we’re still too busy running around after the first two kids to sit down and appreciate what’s happening.

In some ways, it feels like we’re becoming old hands at this. Milestones that were huge surprises with the first and second are now met with a “been there, done that” feeling. The first two pregnancies were polar opposite, this third one is a lot like a mixture of the first two.

In other ways, having a third child is giving us a new baseline to compare the growth of our first two children. My son and daughter are already learning different things at different speeds, so I am really looking forward to seeing what areas the new baby will excel in and in which they will advance more slowly than their siblings.

One thing that I’ve really learned through all this is: There is no “normal”. Depending on the moment, “professional” opinions about my first two kid’s development have been radically different, from “your child is slow” to “your child is well ahead of the curve”. On the third go, we’re a lot more comfortable going with our own sensibilities rather than letting other people dictate how we should raise our children.