Cloth diapers love them or hate them

When Mike and I had our first child we decided to try using cloth diapers. It lasted a few weeks (and that’s being generous) before deciding that it was not worth it and we went back to the disposable diapers. Now fast forward 2 years and you guessed it we are back to cloth diapers.

When we had the one child it seemed like such a chore to use the cloth diapers but with three little ones it seems so much easier. I also did more research this time around and found out that there is 2 ways to keep your soiled diapers. There is the wet method where you have a diaper pail with water, baking soda and vinegar or the dry method where you simply toss the soiled diapers in a pail close the lid and forget about it. When using the dry method if you do have a poop-filled diaper you do need to either swish the dirty diaper in the toilet of throw it on a rinse cycle in the washer.

I also find that if you put down a paper liner in the diaper most of the poop stays on there and you just toss it into the trash. I prefer the dry method to the wet method. It’s easier to lug the laundry downstairs and I don’t need to worry about the kids getting into the dirty diaper water.

I also chose to use different diapers this time around. With our first born I tried the pre-fold with a cover and found it too time consuming between folding the diapers right and getting the baby to sit still it was more or a challenge then it needed to be. This time around I decided to try all-in-ones and also diapers that need a cover but no folding. I am still navigating the world of cloth diapers and trust me there are more kinds than you could ever possibly need.

If you are considering using cloth diapers then I would suggest 2 things.

1. If you don’t want all the work involved in caring for the diapers then look into a diapering service.
2. Go to a local store that sells diapers and ask if they have a trial package so you can test a variety of cloth diapers( I wish I would have).

The great thing about a trial package is most places let you keep the diapers for 2 weeks you try all types of diapers and covers available and you can choose whether or not cloth diapering is for you. I wish I would have done cloth diapers from the beginning cause it is so much better for my little ones bottoms but in life we live and learn.

It’s Easier to Raise Kids with Positivity

There’s been a big change in our household this month, and it is all thanks to a small change in the way we express ourselves. Rather than saying “Don’t throw your food”, we say “The food stays on the table”. Rather than “Don’t hit mommy”, we say “We keep our hands to ourselves”.

Not surprisingly, our son reacts more favorably when we take this approach. If there’s one thing a toddler doesn’t like to hear, it’s the word “NO”. When you tell your child they can’t do something, it’s up to them to figure out what they can do; a young child doesn’t have the capacity to figure that out on their own, so they are more likely to act out.

Telling our son what he can do has made all the difference in the world. When we say “We keep our hands to ourselves” he knows exactly what’s expected of him. “We sit on the couch” is much more understandable than “Don’t stand on the couch”. By including an acceptable action (sitting), we’re implicitly excluding actions we don’t want him doing (like jumping, dancing or standing).

Aside from our son’s improved behaviour, we’re finding the positivity floats into other areas of our lives with our langing shifting to phrases like “We should get something else” rather than “We can’t afford that”. Overall, it’s improved our moods and reactions to everything around us; the change has been extraordinary.

Next time you’re about to tell your child not to dump sand out of the sandbox, take a second to think about the way you’re expressing your wishes. You’re really asking is for your child to keep the sand inside the sandbox. Before long, this kind of thinking and the benefits it can bring will come naturally.

Transitioning A Toddler to a New Baby

If you have a young child at home and a new baby on the way, what can you do to ease the transition to a larger family?

We had this delima and decided on a few things we wanted to accomplish: First, don’t surprise the child with a new sibling – start talking about it as soon as possible; second, don’t move the child to a new room when the baby comes because it will confuse them and make them feel like they’ve lost their comfort zone; finally, make the child feel included in the new baby process so they (hopefully) aren’t resentful when you come home with your new bundle of joy.

Preparations

In our case, the first thing I did was clear out the room I had been using as my office and I painted it a deep relaxing blue for my son. We were moving him to the bigger room because his old room (the nursery) is attached to our own and we would definitely be needing it for the baby. This was done around the 5th month of the pregnancy, so Dylan was able to see changes starting in his mom and start to get to know his new room.

It took about two weeks to do the room since I had a number of repairs to make and wasn’t in a particular rush; it was a fun adventure for him to see the unfolding progress. Finally, I moved his crib and belongings over and let him take a nap in the crib. He was a little confused at first b ut because the situation was non-confrontational it ended up being quite relaxinbg for him.

Next I started on the nursery; tearing down the old decorations and painting it bright and girly. My son was more upset over these changes because it was starting to hit home that the older, smaller room was no longer his. At some point it hit home for him – the change was real.

Meanwhile my wife’s tummy was getting bigger and she was beginning to transition into carrying him less. That was a harder battle to fight because he began to sense that something big was happening and he wanted to be comforted; however, we knew she soon would be physically unable to spend time carrying him – it turned out to be a good decision in the end.

The Delivery

When it was finally time for the new baby to arrive, I had my mother come down and watch my son so we could focus our energy on the labour and know that Dylan was safe. My wife’s parents would also have been more than happy to take him for us, but it was important to us that he remain home in his comfortable environment. We’re very fortunate to have such a close and supportive family.

Four hours after the baby was born, my mother brought Dylan to the hospital to he could meet his new sister. We’d been talking about her for so long, it was nice to see that he actually seemed to understand what he was looking at. It was a sweet family moment that I was happy we were able to share. Thanks Mom!

Aside from meeting his sister, we made sure to have a present ready for him so he would know he was still important to us. Overall it was a very smooth experience.

Settling In

It wasn’t all fun and games, of course. Once we brought the baby home there was an adjustment period. It was one thing to meet his sister in the hospital but Dylan wasn’t so pleased with the situation once there was a screaming baby sharing the house (and mom and dad) with him. Three days away from his parents took a toll and while he was very well behaved for my mother, he was generally inconsolable once we returned. Remember that he is only two years old – he was so happy to have us home but didn’t know how to control his emotions.

It’s been a few weeks now, and we’ve largely settled back to routine. Dylan has accepted Katrina as a permanent fixture of the house and treats her carefully and compassionately. When she cries, he seeks us to soothe her. When we feed her, he gently kisses her forehead. Adding a new member to the family is a major life event but it doesn’t have to be traumatic.

Top-Down Fires for Heating

If you use a wood stove to keep your family warm in the winter – particularly if you have a small wood stove with a low ceiling – you may well have gotten used to waking up out of bed during the night to keep the fire going. It’s not as big a deal to wake up to a cold house once the children are older, but babies are less tolerant of extreme temperature changes which means, yes, another source of sleep deprivation for you.

A top-down – sometimes called front-back – fire is a new-ish (depending on who you ask) technique for building fires. The idea is to burn the fire from the top of the pile down to the bottom; rather than burning all of your wood at the same time, this method will burn a single log which will crumble away as the next starts to burn. With a large enough stove and proper home insulation, this can keep your house comfortably warm all night while you stay in bed.

The way I was shown to build fires goes something like this:

1. Place two large logs next to each other with space in the middle for newsprint
2. Crumple as much newsprint as will comfortably fit between the two logs
3. Lay 4-5 pieces of small wood strips across like a grill in order to catch the heat from the newsprint while at allowing for good airflow
4. Place 2-3 smaller logs on top of the whole apparatus to collect heat from the kindling as it warms up; again allowing lots of space all around for airflow so the fire won’t smother
5. Light the newsprint in a few places and watch the whole thing take off; as long as you’ve left a nice amount of room for air to flow around, you can’t miss. The fire will take off quickly
6. Watch everything fall into a smoldering mess – poke and position the embers and put more wood on top – fire will not die until all fuel is extinguished

I still use this method during the day because it keeps the house nice and hot. The only downside is it requires a lot of maintenance with a small wood stove such as mine, and will smoke badly if not given enough air so constant attention to the airflow and flue is needed. At night, I prefer to use the top-down method:

1. Start at the back of the stove and stack large logs in a tight cluster with as little space between as possible
2. Place 2-3 pieces of dry kindling/wood scraps on top
3. Take 3-4 pieces of newsprint, roll each tightly and tie in a knot, place on top of the kindling
4. Light the newsprint, close the door and walk away

The fire will burn steadily all night. I like to tie the newsprint as if I were tying a shoelace, because there is no kindling to hold it down and this technique will prevent it from blowing away or falling off the wood pile.

The most amazing part of top-down fires is the lack of smoke. Most people are accustomed to the idea of bottom-up fires because as the heat from the flame rises it warms up the larger wood and increases the temperature of the fire. The problem is the air around the wood is not heated as quickly, so when the wood catches it will smoke at first. Top-down flames are pure heat and do not smoke; they won’t leave as much creosote in your chimney and they burn the wood much more completely.

The best part about owning a wood stove is the sense of connectivity you experience with the heating in your home. It’s one thing to flip a switch and have a furnace come on; it’s quite another to gain some level of mastery over the ability to make fire for your own comfort. Everyone who burns wood ultimately figures out their own method for best results; with so many different approaches and models of stoves you can literally spend your whole life improving your technique.

Back to Driving School

If it weren’t for other drivers, the roads would be a pleasant place to drive. Winter conditions don’t frighten me as much as the inept motorists I seem to be sharing the road with – maybe it’s just the time of day I drive to and from work that brings out the worst in people. We’re always told we shouldn’t be afraid of air travel because we’re more likely to be injured or killed in the car on the way to the airport; it is very telling when the police refuse to use the term ‘accident’ because ‘collision’ is more apt – it implies human error and responsibility.

Over the May long weekend here in Ontario, the OPP issued 468 charges for seatbelt offenses. Maybe we could use a physics refresher to remind ourselves that taking two seconds to affix that thin strip of fabric to ourselves when we get in the car will prevent us from flying through the windshield at 40km/h when the car stops suddenly in a crash.

This is important: 7% of Canadians do not use their seatbelts; 40% of collision fatalities did not use their seatbelt.

I can’t help but wonder if more seatbelt use would have improved chances in the deadly crash that killed eight people in Bathurst this May as they returned from basketball tournament in Moncton. Six of the eight victims weren’t wearing their seatbelts when the vehicle crossed the path of a tractor-trailer on an icy road.

Accidents happen fast (I’ll call them that only because ‘collision’ sounds a bit stuffy in this context). The speed in which cars can go from 60 to 0 is incredible and devastating. With so much power beneath us, it only makes sense to stop and think about what we’re doing. Let’s be careful, courteous, and stay alive out there.